All Fall Down
by vlora
Summary: TDI never happened, highschool instead. Gwen thinks she has it all after she gets the popular boy, Trent, and her life is just perfect. At least... it is. All until a certain punk delinquent shows up after three long years. GwenTrent to GwenDuncan.
1. Fairy Tale Ending

**Chapter One; Fairy Tale Ending**

_But I'll never let you know  
I got nothing on you baby  
But I always said I try  
Let me show you how much I care_

Gwen wasn't one to sleep in, or, well… Sleep at all. She was curled up in bed, her eyes fixed carefully on her laptop screen. There was the faint hum of her favourite band in the background, a guitar solo ripping through the silence. She smiled uselessly as she scrolled through absolutely nothing. Honestly, she wondered how she spent so long on her little black laptop.

Wait. Birds chirping. That didn't sound right…

After peering out of the window, Gwen worked out she had actually managed to remain awake _all night_. And it was a school night – day? – whatever! She looked down at the little blue bar at the bottom of the screen; quarter past six. She had somehow managed to "sleep in" while remaining awake. Gwen groaned and slid out of bed, tugging on a black skirt and whatever corseted top was nearby.

Although it was just school, and there was no real need to dress up or anything. Her thigh-high stockings felt standard, however, especially when they were coupled with a pair of thick-soled boots. After checking herself in the mirror, Gwen wandered downstairs to deal with the next issue… Make-up.

It wasn't till 20 minutes later she was fed, properly dressed and ready for her first day of senior life. She had just spent her summer break inside and trying not to burn - with her newly acquired boyfriend. Yes, you heard right, Gwen Yates was dating one Trent Beatle.

(He **is** very aware his family is called "The Beatles" as a plural, but there was no relation to the band like, at all.)

A giggle escaped her lips, almost entirely due to the tickle of a tail across her legs. She had two lizards, Angus and Vampyra, who acted more as pet puppies than lizards. Another part of her had to blame the fact she was about to go to school and come face to face with one of the popular boys – her boyfriend.

The situation was so totally weird she could barely even believe it herself.

"_I'm looking for a guitar."_

_The dark-haired boy smiled in a good-natured way, something Gwen assumed was standard for the industry. No one as cute as this boy ever actually paid attention to her, ever. After about twenty minutes of describing and aiding, Gwen was clutching a newly purchased guitar and the boy's phone-number._

_In truth, she hadn't even meant to buy the guitar. She was looking for it as a present later in the year for her younger brother… But Trent had offered such an awesome mark-down if she agreed to a date (in a nice, flattering way, not a "you're a prostitute" kind of way)._

_Later that week they had their "date" and spent most of it marvelling at the fact they had never seen one another at their school – turns out, they had English together for two years without even realizing._

_And then he kissed her._

_That was four months ago, and what a four months it had been._

"Bus is out the front," Linda, Gwen's mother, called. She watched as her two children fought their way out of the front door and into the bus. She swore those two fought worse the closer they got… It was sort of amusing.

"Freak!"

"Weirdo!" Gwen hissed at her brother Arthur, nicknamed Artie. She settled begrudgingly into the seat next to Trent. Out of habit, she stuck her tongue out at Artie once more before turning her attention to her very good-looking, sweet, artistic, talented, _amazing_ boyfriend. Something in her screamed that, if this was one of those teen movies, they would have faded to the credits right at this point… She was the loner goth girl that proved that you could have a cute, popular boyfriend.

Real life wasn't like that, but it was fun to pretend. "How was your summer?" she asked curiously, resting her cheek on Trent's shoulder.

"I met this really sweet girl," he chuckled, settling his arm around her shoulders, his thumb massaging her arm as the bus stopped and started at random. Those who weren't up-to-date with their social networking sites looked entirely confused by Trent's newest girlfriend; in particular that Heather Fowler girl.

"_I can't believe he's pity-dating her."_

That was what Gwen had heard at a party they'd attended, those words spoken to the ditzy, blonde, cheerleader girl known as Lindsay. All this time she had pretended not to care what other people thought about her, but… She wasn't prepared for people to openly dislike her so much for being happy. Especially not when Trent would defend Heather and say that Gwen just didn't _know_ her like he did. Whatever that meant.

"I heard your girlfriend was a bitch," Gwen joked, her eyes flickering shut as she allowed the bus to ebb her into sleep. She had stayed up _all_ night chatting and looking up websites and reading stories… It was a little tragic. It wasn't til they arrived at school that Trent actually woke her up with a gentle shake.

"We're at school," he pointed out needlessly, taking her hand in his own. Gwen stumbled after him as he exited the bus, her eyes refusing to properly open.

"Do I have to?"

"It's senior year, Gwen. Only a few more months…" Trent assured her, his hand maintaining its grip of her own. He gave it a gentle squeeze as they set off for the office where they could pick up their schedules and locker numbers. Trent kindly picked up Gwen's for her, as she was way too tired to actually pay attention to the fact she'd grabbed someone else's file.

"Unless your name is Duncan Marshall, that isn't yours," he chuckled as he handed the folder back. Gwen smacked her lips momentarily before her eyes widened.

"Huh, wait… what?"

Trent raised an eyebrow at Gwen, "Huh?"

"What name did you just say?" Gwen asked, suddenly more awake.

"Um… Duncan - something... March?" Trent attempted, tugging Gwen off in the direction of their lockers. They were conveniently placed across the hall from one another, allowing Gwen the ability to make out with her boyfriend and get her books within ten feet of the same location. As they arrived, Trent set to work unlocking his locker with the provided code. Gwen just slumped against the wall next to him, yawning loudly. "Why did you ask?"

"Uh, about that name? Used to – um – dude that I used to know that was a guy…" Gwen strung together, her sentence barely passing for 5th grade English.

"It's probably just some freshman kid with a similar name."

"Mhh. The little bastards _would_ try to confuse me when I'm sleep deprived."

"Gwen!" Trent scolded her, idly stuffing the majority of his books into his locker. He was clearly kidding though, his smirk showed it all. "Try and be nice."

"I am nice."

"To me, yeah… But people will like you more if you're not always calling them names," Trent pointed out as he closed the door of his locker. He gave Gwen an apologetic look, "Not that people don't like you. You're totally likable."

"U-huh… Well… _You_ love my nicknames, Elvis," Gwen wearily smirked, her arms crossed against her chest. Trent just sighed (in amusement) and gave her a chaste kiss on the lips. After Gwen had worked out her own locker situation, they set off for their mutual English class. It seemed they were continuing their tradition of sharing English, something they could fully appreciate at this point of their relationship.

Still… Duncan Marshall… It was such a _familiar_ name. And a name Gwen hadn't even thought about since she was about 15 and crying her eyes out.

Trent opened the door for her as they arrived at English, his eyes lighting up as she giggled out a 'thank you'. They were such a well-oiled machine, acting like they had been in this relationship for their entire lives rather than a few months. They sat carefully in the middle of the classroom, not right at the front with the teacher, but not at the desks that usually housed the drop-kicks.

Gwen was a goth, but she was a _smart_ goth.

The rest of the class filed in, only a few friendly faces bothering to smile. It was the first day of school _and_ it was English. Mr. McLean was a total bore, mostly because all he ever did was ask them to write essays or poetry about how amazing _he_ was. Gwen had received perfect marks because she could lie quite easily. Plus, all she had to do was pretend she was writing about Johnny Depp or even a guy like _Marilyn Manson_, and her teacher would eat it up. The _worst_ part? Mr. McLean also ran their homeroom sessions, which were sort of part of English… It was weird.

"Yo dude," Geoff greeted with a giant smile, waggling his hand at Trent with some weird bro symbol Gwen would never understand.

"Hey," Trent replied in his usual manner. He started chatting with Geoff and DJ, mostly about their holidays (even if they'd hung out over the holidays). Gwen just sat quietly doodling in her sketchbook, ignoring the sudden influx of people into the room. That was until LeShawna prodded her in the side of the head, hugging Gwen to her chest.

"Girl, you _did not_ lose weight did you? You're even skinnier than the last time I saw you!" the girl whined, a worried expression coming over her face.

"You're worse than my mother," Gwen laughed, closing her sketchbook with a small thump.

"Just thought you might need remindin' that eating Trent's face all day ain't three square meals," LeShawna smirked, sitting down in the desk next to Gwen.

Gwen simply muttered something about LeShawna being stupid and that she was eating more than Trent's face – and something about how _wrong_ that statement sounded. It wasn't before long her face was pressed against her desktop as she snored softly. Damn it, she needed to sleep more.

"Alright, let's get this party started!" Mr. McLean announced from the front of the class. Gwen had barely noticed everyone else marching in and sitting down, least of all the teacher at the front of the class. "I just want to start off by saying welcome to another year at Wawanakwa High School! I'm sure you'll all have a totally dramatic and emotionally challenging year!"

He was _weird._

The class begun, homework handed in (yeah, holiday homework, ugh) and a casual discussion of what everyone did over the holidays. She learned a little too much about the kid who thought he was a white rapped, Ezekiel, and something from Harold about ninja camp. She could hardly pay attention in her current state. She considered just bailing, but Trent kept sending her worried glances and that kept her in her spot.

"And uh," Mr. McLean pointed rather than said the kid's name. Gwen frowned; he'd taught them all for the past three years… How did he _not_ know their names?

"Duncan."

"Well Duncan, how about you tell us about your summer," Mr. McLean encouraged, sitting on his desk in a casual "_I'm a cool dude in his 30s_" kind of way; actually, it was more the "_I'm not actually cool_" kind of way. Gwen swivelled on the spot, an unimpressed expression on her face. "You _are_ new and I'm sure all of us are wondering about you…"

"I got out of juvie," the smirking punk announced, his hands settled behind his head as he sunk into his seat, "and, y'know… normal teen things like drank and made out with _girls_," Duncan scoffed in Harold and Ezekeil's direction, an amused smirk continuing to tug across his features.

"Sparky?" Gwen stared boggle-eyed at the boy.

Duncan's vandal expression deepened, "Sunshine?"

Everyone in the room felt suddenly awkward upon seeing this exchange. Especially Trent, who seemed a little threatened by the punk who was currently eyeing his girlfriend like she was a piece of meat. Mr. McLean frowned, calling the class's attention back to himself.

That didn't spot Gwen from casting surprised and anxious looks over her shoulder. It also didn't stop Duncan from checking out the little goth number sitting in front of him. And it certainly didn't stop Owen from gassing out the English class midway through the period.

For once, Gwen was thankful. It allowed her time to talk to Sparky – Duncan – _him._

_**AN: **__**How does Gwen know Duncan! What does Heather want with Trent! Will Gwen ever actually sleep! Will you review!**_

_**DRAMA TWISTS WHAT'S GOING ON OH SNAP. **_

_**Now! **__**The song at the start is by The Killers. It's called The List and was just playing as I wrote this… So. Recommended listening is The Killers, Ludo and Vampire Weekend!**_


	2. The Gothification of Gwen

**Chapter Two; ****The Gothification of Gwen**

"So dudes and dudettes, what did you do for your holidays… Bridgette? Stop making out with Geoff!_ Sheesh_," Mr. McLean half-yelled, his arms flailing wildly above his head.

The class meandered around outside the classroom as Mr. McLean tried to continue his lesson. All the students were glaring daggers at Owen who just smiled apologetically; it was a rather standard occurrence. Gwen's attention was elsewhere for the moment, her eyes narrowed in Duncan's direction. She wasn't sure if she should run over and hug him, or punch him square in the face… Mixed emotions sucked, like, _a lot_.

"Gwen, I don't think you should talk to him," Trent urged, taking her hand into his own. His own eyes were fixed on Duncan who was currently trying to chat up the stuck-up student council representative, Courtney Garcia (who was entirely unimpressed with his efforts). He turned his attention back to Gwen after Duncan noticed.

"Why not?" Gwen asked with a surprisingly harsh tone. She mumbled a 'sorry' afterwards, countering her harsh statement with a kiss to Trent's cheek.

"He was in _juvie_," Trent pointed out, "he probably did something like kill someone… or set fire to a house! And look at his mohawk…" Trent dismissed, giving Gwen's hand a gentle squeeze, "c'mon, we can go to the cafeteria or figure out if the library is still wrecked from the prank Geoff pulled last year," he suggested, tugging Gwen after him. Though this was before he noticed Duncan swaggering over to them, his head tilted at an inquisitive angle. It was almost as if he couldn't believe what he was seeing.

"Hey," the punk delinquent welcomed. His expression soured a little when he noticed Trent picked up the pace. "You aren't pissed at me or something, are you?" Duncan cast a look over to Trent, his jaw set in a gentle smirk. After a moment, he dropped his eye line to the back of Gwen (who seemed to be ignoring him for whatever lame girly reason). "Sup Sunshine?"

Gwen turned eventually to look over her shoulder. She met Duncan's teal eyes with a hurt, reproachful pout. Part of her was wondering how she could have considered punching him. With a rather hearty tug, her hand was free from Trent's and she was rushing back to hug Duncan tightly. "Not much," she sighed, happily hugging the boy. He returned the gesture, his arms quickly wrapping around her waist as they stood rather contently in the hallway. "You?"

"Just wonderin' when the hell you dyed your hair and started dressing like death."

"Says the guy with the _Astroturf_ for hair," Gwen laughed, ruffling the Mohawk.

The ruffled hair gesture was brief, but unusually attention grabbing. Gwen wasn't known for her social skills. Half the students in the class turned to stare, clearly not understanding the situation. After a few moments of pleasantries and laughed in-jokes, Gwen sighed through her nose and looked back to her boyfriend, Trent. "Um. I know this must look _weird_, but I can explain," Trent looked less than impressed, "_really_."

"We're long-lost lovers from the future -"

"Shut up, Duncie."

"Make me Gwennie," Duncan growled back, jabbing her in the side with his elbow. After noticing the unimpressed expression on Trent's face, he rolled his eyes, "This is your boyfriend, right?" Gwen nodded, "Riiight… That _was_ a joke, Elvis," Duncan dismissed with his arms crossed in front of him, "we're actually from the past. Ow! Gwen, that hurt like a fu - " (Gwen had taken on a sour expression, delivering a punch to Duncan's shoulder as hard as she could).

"Trent, Duncan, Gwen!" Mr. McLean shouted, waving his hand at them, "I'm trying to teach, even if we're in a hallway! If you don't be quiet I'll have to give out detentions." Courtney rolled her shoulders with a smirk back at the three of them, her arms crossed just under her bust. Duncan sent her a little wave, causing her to scoff and turn her attention back to the teacher (and Heather who was blabbering about her holidays).

The three were stunned into silence. Well, Trent and Gwen were stunned, and Duncan just rolled his eyes and started playing a game on his phone.

…

"You're best friends?" Trent repeated blandly, his eyes glazed over.

"Basically! We were for like…" Gwen thought about it, counting on her fingers, "well, we lived next to each other from the day I was born until I was… 13? I think I was 13." With a small sigh, Gwen unwrapped her homemade sandwich and began to devour the ham and cheese delight. Homemade always beat the crap they served at school in the cafeteria. She glanced around the large open room, her eyes falling on her usual table across from her.

It was Pixie Corpse, and Reaper and Marilyn. They weren't looking too fondly in her direction; though they liked the fact she was happy with her boyfriend, it was clear that they didn't really mesh with the blonde girl (Lindsay) who was currently trying to work out if butter was a carb. It felt a little weird not sitting with her friends. Trent had insisted she sit with him...

"You – I mean, _we_ can sit with them tomorrow," Trent assured her, his hand resting over hers as they ate lunch. Gwen took the gesture with a smile, having grown used to the touchy-feely nature Trent did little to hide. She didn't mind though, she felt appreciated. It was a nice change.

"Sure, as long as I don't have to pretend to be nice to Heather," Gwen yawned, pulling her hand away from Trent's to fiddle with her fringe.

…

"_Catch Tiffany!" Heather cackled, lobbing Gwen's sketchbook across the hallway. It was so juvenile, so childish, so__ evil… So Heather. It went on for a few moments, though Gwen made absolutely no move to actually try and grab the book. It would result in her just making an idiot of herself in front of half the school._

"_Don't you have some orphans to kick?" a boy asked from behind Heather, his red eyes narrowed at her._

"_Hand over the sketchbook," the one with a tuft of pink hair seethed._

"_**Now!**__" the taller, purple-haired girl snapped, her hand extended._

_Gwen hadn't noticed the Goth kids walk up behind Heather and snatch the sketchbook away, glaring at the tall, Asian girl. Gwen had always heard how weird those kids were, but they'd just helped her… No one ever helped her. She smiled and mumbled a thank you, blushing profusely out of nature. They just smiled, looking through the sketchbook with amazement and intrigue__._

_This was the first day of freshman high school life for Gwen. She was only 14, a year after she'd lost her best friend. She looked between the two girls (both in her year, she later found out) and smiled. Maybe she had some new best friends coming her way…_

…

Gwen swallowed a particularly dry piece of her sandwich, her eyes guiltily falling to her table. She really needed to go talk to Duncan, like, right now. She excused herself with a lie, ("Yes, I can go to the toilet on my own. I don't need an escort."), Gwen started to wander through the halls of the school. She checked the library, the sports court, the hallways, the tables in the shade and, finally, the car park.

Her mind swam with places he might be, but the only place she hadn't thought of was the area all the dropkicks and the losers hung out. All they did was smoke and talk about the girls they slept with… Gwen knew Duncan, and that hardly sounded like his kind of scene. She decided that it might as well be worth a shot, so she set off in that direction.

That's where she found him.

**AN: REVIEW!**

Also, this is named "All Fall Down" because of the song "_Necessary Evil_" by Dresden Dolls. "_I remember golden days when all this was a mystery, and you could write a letter then or god forbid come visit me."_


	3. I Like You Liking Me

**Chapter Three; ****I Like You Liking Me **

"Duncan!" Gwen called out, jogging across the teachers' carpark toward the lone figure of Duncan. He'd already made friends with the burn-outs, sharing a laugh about something or another… Gwen didn't really want to know. She cast a pleading gaze at him, trying to show she didn't really want to stand and chat nearby a bunch of losers.

"Mhh Spooky?" Duncan drew out, smoke escaping his lips.

"Spooky?"

"You look like you're out of a scary movie…" Duncan explained, his head tilting slightly to the side, "I remember when you used to have pink shirts and curly brown hair out to here," he emphasized this point with his hands about two feet away from his head either side. The boys around him started laughing, smoke pervading the air with each labored huff.

"Don't." Gwen just pouted, her hands resting in front of her as she waited for him to get the message. After a moment, he seemed to click and waved a momentary farewell to the guys standing around smoking. Gwen ignored the packet Duncan tucked into his pocket, deciding there were bigger and better things to be discussing.

"So?" Gwen huffed, her hands on her sides now. They were standing just behind the school gym, leaning inside the indented doorway. She had no idea why they were standing in such a secretive place… It didn't make much sense.

"So."

"Why are you back? You left," Gwen began, her arms crossed neatly in front of her.

"No Spooky," Duncan corrected, "my family moved away."

Gwen sighed heavily through her nose, her hands now settled on her face. Gwen stood for a moment in thought before she felt Duncan step well into her personal space. She was fairly sure he was hugging her, but with her hands over her face, she wasn't entirely sure. She stood silently, allowing him to hug her. "Seriously Duncan. You went to juvie?"

Duncan just nodded, "Uh. Yeah… I guess a lot changes in five years, right?" The truth of this statement hit her suddenly. In the past, he'd never smelt like Axe. He'd never had such buff arms. And he really never had that stupidly cute twinkle in his eye when he laughed. They used to play fight, and make mud pies and do stupid kids stuff.

Gwen dislodged herself, her hand fiddling with her fringe once again. "Okay. Well. You're a punk now… And you have piercings."

"Oh, we're playing _that_ game, are we?" Duncan asked with a roll of his shoulders, his hands now tucked in his pockets, "Well _okay_. You lost weight, rolled around in Hot Topic for a while... And you got boobs. Oh, _and_ a hot dye job," he flicked her fringe for her, laughing as she glared daggers at him, "seriously, why'd you goth it up, Sunshine?"

Gwen spent the entire time scowling at him, her eyes narrowed to mere slits. "Because I made friends with the goth kids. They defended me after all the girls realized you'd left!" Gwen defended, her arms flying up for emphasis.

"What?"

Gwen sighed, "Another day, okay? You have to tell me why you never replied to my letters…" Gwen pointed out, her arms now crossed lowly across her front.

"You sent letters?"

"Yeah, till about summer last year…" she admitted with a blush crossing her cheeks. It wasn't like she sent letters daily… Just every couple of months she'd send a letter to Duncan's family at their new address. Since he was at juvie… maybe his dad hadn't bothered to pass them on. Gwen frowned; she _really _didn't like Duncan's dad at the best of times.

"Riiiight, you're just saying that to make me seem like the one who ditched you," he argued, tilting his head back in an appraising manner. He seemed to dismiss this argument, unsure why he was spending so much time being hostile with a girl he considered his best friend… "Anyway, so, that dude in Hollister getup was your – butler?"

"Boyfriend."

"No fucking _way_," Duncan scoffed, his eyes lighting up in the same stupid way.

"Yes! He's really sweet – hey, you _do not_ get to come back after five years and start making fun of my boyfriend!" Gwen snapped angrily, her cheeks glowing red. They shared a moment of eye contact before Duncan shrugged and turned away slightly, as if surveying the area around them. They shared another thoughtful look before Duncan tugged out his cigarettes once more.

"Listen sweetheart…" he dismissed, lighting one and taking a drag before turning his attention back to her, "as far as _I'm_ concerned, any Hollister poser who tries to get into your gothic skirt can kiss my ass."

Gwen's face curled up into an expression of annoyance and confusion. Her mind trailed back for a moment, her eyes averting to the ground.

…

"_Duncan! Stop hitting Cody!" Gwen cried, tugging Duncan away from the boy who was curled up on the ground in fear. She frowned a little as Duncan refused to calm down, his hands still fisted up in front of him._

"_He was the idiot who kept hassling you to kiss him, wasn't he!" Duncan raged, eyes livid._

"_Yes! But," Gwen chewed her lip, "I think he just likes me… so… I don't think you need to hurt him for liking me," Gwen added softly, punctuating her point with a scowl. They glared at one another long enough for Cody to scamper away and hide in the library._

"_I like you! You don't need other guys liking you too," he resolutely growled, calming down with each passing second._

"_I know you like me, but I would like a boyfriend one day," Gwen laughed, missing the point entirely. They passed the rest of the school day discussing stupid, meaningless things that Gwen couldn't even recall. She just kept thinking over and over… _

…

Gwen debated for a moment what to say. She sighed resolutely, outstretching her hand to Duncan. He instinctually handed her the half-burned cigarette. She proceeded to drop it to the ground and stomp it out, "Smoking kills… And I'm not letting you leave me again," she pointed out, the first genuine smile she'd had for a long while emerging across her features.

"I don't intend to leave again," Duncan admitted with a wry smile.

They had a lot to discuss, yes, but Gwen decided that, that could come some other time… Once she'd worked out how she'd managed to miss calls from Trent, and not hear the two messages from Pixie Corpse.

**A/N:**** Yes, it's all a little vague, but it'll become clearer as the story progresses.**

**REVIEW PLEASE!**


	4. Differences Make You Similar

**Chapter ****Four; Differences Make You Similar**

Gwen settled into her computer chair at home, awkwardly wriggling her boots off her feet. There was something about the day that struck her as weird… Not even the fact her long-lost best friend had returned after five years, or the fact he was now a hot punk – no, not hot. Duncan wasn't hot; he was her best friend. Kind of. She wasn't even sure where they stood anymore. All she could do was try to think about their first meeting… It was impossible.

For years, Gwen's mother and father had fought; it was something she didn't care to think about too often or too much about. It was just a fact of life for her. So, whenever things got too much she would just wriggle through the hole in her fence and go to see Duncan and his family. Even if Duncan's father was a little too strict for her liking, at least he was never yelling at Duncan's mother.

Just at Duncan.

Gwen propped her head up on her hand, staring vacantly out of her window. She'd lived in this house all her life. It seemed a little strange even now that Duncan wasn't next door… "Jerk," she sighed, standing up from the desk. Maybe it was best that he wasn't close to her anymore… After all, he had gone to juvie for reasons he refused to discuss. Had he assaulted someone? Or… worse? She doubted it, she knew her Duncan.

_Buzz._

Out of instinct, Gwen snatched up her phone, quickly answering the call. "Sup?" she greeted, her hand grasping at her elbow; she had a particularly girly way of answering the phone it seemed.

"Hey Gwen," Trent greeted from the other end, his voice a little brighter than she'd ever heard before. Then suddenly, she realized her fault. Rather than waiting for him at the end of the day by the school's main exit like she'd promised, she had actually walked home in a dire need to escape people. She was a loner at heart, and so she needed her alone time. Trent understood that most of the time, but with Duncan back in town, he seemed a little on edge.

"Trent! Hi!" Gwen greeted in a rather squeaked voice.

"Expecting someone else to call?" he asked with a chuckle. Gwen gave a pity laugh, sitting down on the edge of her bed.

"No, of course not. I just didn't – I'm sorry about ditching. I just needed some alone time," Gwen pointed out, her fingers messing with the ends of her hair.

"Oh. Sorry."

"No! No, it's not _you_, it's Duncan," she exasperatedly sighed, her feet swinging up onto the bed. She didn't actually know if she wanted to discuss this right now with Trent, especially not when he thought that Gwen and Duncan were secretly dating or something equally ridiculous. After a rather short conversation about how Trent had done nothing wrong, and _no,_ she didn't need him to come over for hugs and kisses but she appreciated the gesture, Gwen hung up the phone. Trent was a sweetheart, but sometimes she wondered if he liked her too much…. Something she thought was impossible.

"Whatever," Gwen sighed, laying on her bed with her arms over her face. It was just nice to be home, alone, with only her thumping music to keep her company.

…

_Music rung through the store like there was an airplane taking off with a bass beat behind it. People screamed, sung and howled in unison, trying their best to convey years of anguish in a mere three minutes. There was the smell of vintage clothing and worn leather, and even a few corsets here and there._

"_Are you sure it's safe?" Gwen asked, donned in a Hot Topic outfit. _

"_You're big enough to start shopping where we shop," Marylyn giggled, patting Gwen gently on the shoulder. In truth, they'd spent a good year or so suggesting that she come shopping with them; Gwen had always been too afraid to actually do it because she thought it'd be another place to be made fun of. She was delightfully surprised when she arrived at a decrepit old alleyway with a worn painted sign, "Peril"._

"_What's that music?" Gwen asked vigilantly, her eyes searching for the sound system._

"_Just the newest, hottest, most amazing band ever! Gothic Mind Explosion!" Pixie pointed out with a small bounce to punctuate the statement._

"_Gothic Mind Explosion?" Gwen asked in a shaky voice, her hands resting neatly on her ears__. Pixie and Reaper just laughed, patting her on the head as if she were a small child. They were fifteen, standing in a dingy music store downtown._

…

After a few weeks, Gwen was an avid fan and knew everything about every band member. She had a huge crush on the lead guitarist who had swept black hair and dazzling green eyes. Unsurprisingly, this leant itself well to her new boyfriend. She caught herself staring at the poster, her cheeks thumping a stupid red.

"Homework," she assured herself, rolling off her bed and going in search of her school books. She needed to get a scholarship. Seeing as her dad refused to pay child support (and with some creative work by his lawyers, he was able to get away with it). Her mother worked heaps and Gwen didn't want to have to ask her to pay for it – she had to do this herself. Hell, she even worked at the local petting zoo to add to her college funds.

After about twenty minutes of tapping away at her laptop for an English diary (which Mr. McLean had _already _assigned), Gwen re-read the first few paragraphs. The gist of it was…

_Dear Diary._

_You suck._

_I hate school._

_I hate homework._

_Go die._

_Love Gwen Yates._

Maybe that wasn't going to get her any points with her teacher, but… it worked. She had typed it all with a wide smile on her face, so she wasn't depressed – despite what the teachers tried to tell her mother. Gwen rolled her eyes, her arm linked over the back of her seat. "Fucking teachers…" Gwen cursed, massaging the space between her eyes for a brief moment.

The sound of high heels clicked downstairs, bringing a smile to Gwen's face. For once she was actually excited to see her mother get home. Yes, she loved her mother, but usually it was an unspoken hello and a question of where dinner was.

"Hey mom!" Gwen called out, rushing from her room and down the stairs. She skidded into the kitchen to see her mother carrying some take-out boxes and a smirk on her face.

"Mm Gwennie?" Linda asked with a gentle laugh, setting the dinner down. She attempted some semblance of professionalism as she pulled out three equal sized plates for Gwen, Artie and herself. Her eyes skipped between the clock, Gwen and the food at regular intervals, "How was school?"

Gwen seemed to think for a moment, her lip caught between her teeth, "Well…"

"Ooo, you look like something happened," Linda giggled. She loved to hear about Gwen's school life, even if it was uneventful for the most part. It was just hard for her, as she rarely saw her children between her working and their social lives… Artie was barely ever around anymore.

"Mom, no, it's nothing like that…" Gwen dismissed angrily, shaking her head. After a moment she bounced on the balls of her feet, "Well… Duncan's back."

"I know! Isn't it **wonderful**? I saw his mother today when I was at the store, she seemed so _happy_ to be back…" Linda happily chimed, handing a plate to Gwen. Gwen accepted it with a smile and a nod. They were happy to be back? Then why had they even left in the first place? She considered the reason Duncan had given her; apparently his father had some business deal with his work that he'd be head of the police department in another town – another _state._ Neither Duncan or Gwen were too happy with this, obviously, and it worked out that Duncan would be out of Ontario for good – or so they thought.

"Y-Yeah. Wonderful…"

"What's the matter?"

Gwen considered the question. She actually didn't know what was wrong with her. It was partially the fact she hadn't really spoken to her best friends all day, partially the fact Trent was getting a _little_ clingy but mostly… "Duncan's – different," Gwen admitted. It wasn't even something she had admitted to herself just yet, so Gwen felt a little stupid to allow herself to freely speak of such a newly considered issue. Duncan was way too different. He was sarcastic, dark, punk and hot – it wasn't the bubbly best friend of yesteryear, and more the kind of guy she'd have dated when she was 15 or 16. That was a weird thought to the young goth girl, especially with her previous dreams of Duncan returning and everything going back to the way it used to be…

"Honey, have you seen _yourself_? I say that in the most loving, motherly way but…" Linda chewed her bottom lip, her arms neatly crossed. Her pink suit remained immaculately unwrinkled, as if made from some kind of stern fabric. "You're nothing like the little girl Duncan used to poke bugs at. You're – you've grown up. You've gotten into your little goth phase and he's, well… how is he different?" Linda asked, sitting down at the table with a thoughtful look.

"He's – a punk."

"So he's kind of like you now?"

"No! It's so different… mom, he smokes," Gwen tattled, "don't tell his dad or mom or anything. Okay? But… The Duncan I used to know would never do that. And he went to juvie… And he swears worse than dad used to," Gwen added with a rise to her right eyebrow.

"The Duncan you used to know was 13," Linda brushed her fringe out of her eyes, settling into her sweet and sour pork from the Chinese takeout place they always went to. She seemed to think before speaking once again, "Gwen, honey, people are allowed to change. _Especially_ when they're teenagers… I'm sure he's still the same old Duncan underneath all the punk," Linda critically announced, nibbling thoughtfully on a large piece of chicken.

"I _guess_, but -"

"Maybe you'll like this Duncan even more, if you give it a chance" Linda added with a forceful tone. She was still smiling, but the intention of her words was clear. She'd spent weeks convincing Gwen to eat after Duncan had left; the girl seemed to have lost her will to go on, something that worried and concerned Artie and Linda. Her little girl had lost her best friend and her father in the same year; it was a lot for a little girl to go through.

"Maybe," Gwen admitted finally, her eyes darting up as Artie strolled through the door with his guitar latched to his back.

**A/N:**** There's a link in my profile to a "photo" of younger!Gwen and younger!Duncan. Hope you enjoy!**


	5. No Way, No How

Chapter Five; No Way, No How

_Buzz._

_Buzz._

_Buzz._

After the seventh or eighth message from Trent, Gwen simply turned her phone off and plodded off to have a shower. She felt utterly useless, and every message further cemented the sick feeling in her stomach. All she wanted was to draw, have fun, and enjoy the fluidity of life. Instead she was being boxed into plans and grand ideas, not to mention the constant assumption she wanted to be around people.

It was a month after Duncan had resurfaced in her hometown, and it wasn't treating her well. Most of the time, they actually just _ignored_ one another. Why? Gwen didn't actually know. To her, Duncan was supposed to be the cute, slightly older boy who would always protect her from the creeps and geeks of life. That was what she used to think, at least.

Now?

She had seen Duncan slamming a freshman into a locker and demanding lunch money. She'd seen him making moves on Courtney - Gwen had a sneaking suspicion they'd actually been hooking up between classes, but that was a rumor more than anything else. Gwen shouldn't have cared so much about that, especially because she was with Trent.

Even that was beginning to annoy her.

"Freakin' boys," Gwen mumbled under her breath as she blindly stumbled into her bedroom. One hand searched for her light switch as the other loosely clutched at her towel; she had forgotten to take her PJs into the bathroom with her. In a matter of minutes she was tugging on a pair of booty shorts and a tank top, her hair pulled back in a wet, messy bun. There was a crackle of knocks from the door.

"Come in," Gwen sighed, turning languidly with a hand poised on her hip.

Rather than the mother she'd been expecting, she was met with a boy. Duncan. While she wasn't even wearing a _bra_.

"What the hell!" Gwen shrieked, her arms tightly pressed to her front. It wasn't hard to notice she had turned a speedy shade of red, her eyes widening with each second he seemed _not_ to care. She had a shirt on, sure, but seriously? She was dressed for _BED_. Not for hosting some delinquent with a bad streak a mile wide.

"I figured you stilled lived here so I thought I'd come visit?" Duncan asked with a laugh, an eyebrow darting up his forehead. She looked a little more than annoyed - something that definitely perplexed him. "You okay?"

"At this time of night! Without even _asking?" _Gwen was absolutely mortified, her cheeks reddening to the point she felt woozy. Shock could only account for so much. Part of her was actually kind of excited by the idea he'd come to see her so late, unannounced. What was his deal?

"I sent you a message, you just never replied," Duncan explained, sitting on the edge of her bed. He seemed intrigued by the room rather than put off - most people (usually relatives) were thrown off by the gothic décor, band posters and occasional spider. Fake spiders, but still. Gwen watched him carefully, her bottom lip jutted out at an angry angle.

"Did you maybe think I wanted to be alone?"

"Uh, duh," Duncan replied.

"And you came, why?" (Duncan simply gave her an amused smirk at the words she'd chosen - honestly, how could he have such a dirty mind?) "Seriously Duncan…"

"Because you've been avoiding me all month for no reason?" Duncan stated, though it sounded more like a question than anything else. He sat with his elbows lazily strewn on either knee, his eyes barely keeping focus on her face. Gwen turned quickly and pulled on an oversized hoodie, her eyes narrowed back over to him as quickly as she could manage.

"You haven't tried to talk to me," Gwen pointed out, sitting pertly on the edge of her bed.

…

_"Gwen, talk to me," Duncan __called up the tree, his eyes squinted towards Gwen's noticeably pink-shirted figure._

_"No!"_

_Duncan frowned, running his hand through his short, spiky black hair. Why was it always his fault when Gwen got like this? She'd insist on being alone, even though he __**knew**__she hated being alone - almost as much as she hated small spaces. After contemplating his options, he gave him._

_"Fine! I'll talk at you then," he spat angrily, his fists curled by his sides. For two thirteen-year-olds, they were surprisingly open and angry at one another over the simplest things… This time it had been… well… "I know you're angry about me playing Spin The Bottle at Owen's birthday, and I'm sorry I kissed Heather! She's just -"_

_Gwen dropped from her branch, landing with surprising grace. She straightened up, brushing at her sleeves and jeans before glaring at Duncan with more venom than she had ever before. "Actually, I was pissed about you kissing Courtney…"_

_"Oh. Riiight…"_

…

Duncan rubbed at his eyebrow for a moment before sitting a little closer to Gwen, "I have. You've just been busy chatting to Elvis - eh, Trent," he corrected as Gwen jabbed him in the knee with her finger. As he realized she wasn't going to say anything else, he sighed, "Okay, we'll talk."

"Starting from when you left," Gwen corrected, her eyebrows furrowing together.

…

_"So…__My dad got a better job," Duncan stupidly began, his pet spider, Scruffy, running from one hand to another. Gwen watched in sick amusement, giggling as Duncan brandished it at her - he always liked that she enjoyed his love of spiders… Most other girls screamed and ran, like Courtney Garcia._

_"Oh? No more police force?" Gwen wondered happily, her legs crossed in a pretzel shape. They were sitting in Duncan's darkly furnished room._

_"Not… no, still police…" Duncan shyly continued. He set Scruffy into his tank, his hands settled awkwardly on his hips. "Actually, he's just movin' up in the force…"_

_"You don't sound too happy about it," Gwen cooed, her head tilting at a cute angle._

_"That's 'cause it's out of town…"_

_"So your dad is moving?" Gwen asked with a laugh, nervously stepping toward Duncan. He turned quickly to pull away from her, her expression marred with upset._

_"Gwen, do you have to be so goddamn hopeful all the time?" Duncan practically yelled, his teeth bared in accidental anger, "it's kinda __**obvious **__that I'll have to move with him, with my mom… Out of state, Gwen."_

_"We can still be best friends, right?"_

_"I guess."_

_"You __**guess**__?"_

_"I might make new friends - or get a girlfriend - I don't know. I'm not gonna make stupid promises I'll end up breaking."_

_Gwen just stared at him, glassy-eyed. She wasn't sure if it was the news of his departure, or the fact he'd yelled at her, but it lead to a fight. They yelled at one another, __bringing up flaws and peeves they'd always loved about one another. It was in this moment Gwen threw away her perpetual optimism for a blander shade of pragmatism._

_The last time Gwen saw him was when she hugged him and wished him a hollow goodbye, barely making eye contact with him. It was in the following weeks and months (and soon to be years) that she realized most people were never genuinely nice to her. It was often out of fear of Duncan, or in some girls' cases, interest. This was especially evident when Heather flatly informed Gwen she was too fat to sit with her and her friends at lunch one day._

…

Gwen wasn't exactly sure how many times she'd regretted her reactions (and overreactions). It was a miracle that Duncan was back at all, and yet she acted like it was some plague out to get her. What she feared most was perhaps just her old self creeping back onto her; the insecure, goofy 13-year-old who would blindly follow those who were nice to her.

With an accusatory glare, she swiveled on her bed to face Duncan, her eyes narrowed. "You're different -"

"So're you."

"Exactly my point…" Gwen sighed, her eyes searching for something in his face, something she didn't even understand. She debated for a moment internally before flexing her hands, "So I've become goth. Big deal. I'm also sarcastic, withdrawn, and a loner…" she rattled off her, eyes not leaving Duncan's, "but I'm still the stupid little girl who thought you'd stay, even if your family all moved away."

Duncan seemed mildly taken aback by that admittance, his head reclining slightly onto his shoulder, "I'm pretty much the same badass…"

"Except you smoke, drink, commit crimes, not to mention -"

She was cut off by Duncan rolling his eyes and scuffing her hair up, "Same Duncan, just _older_, babe."

Gwen simply glared at him, "Okay, how about… we start over. Not, over-over… Just, from where we left off?" Gwen suggested.

"So, me throwing dirt clump at you, and beating up dudes who talk to you?"

"I'll break your arm if you do," Gwen sung back, hugging her knee to her chest. Her chin sat happily on her knee, a smile playing stupidly across her lips. They maintained a moment of eye contact, Gwen's smile ebbing away her anger and annoyance for the years he'd been away.

"I like you like this," Duncan admitted with a smirk.

"Guess you aren't so bad, Sparky."

Duncan just chuckled, "Give it time, you'll find I _am._"

The night progressed flawlessly, with Gwen outlining her favorite bands, her new friends and generally what she had been up to in the years they'd been apart. Duncan was a little more reluctant to admit any information (outside of the fact he had a fake ID and a Ford Mustang).

As they grew more and more weary, Gwen suggested that he just stay over the night. They'd had sleepovers that many times growing up, their parents were more than used to it… even if they were almost 18 now. Gwen wasn't sure she minded that she'd fallen asleep on Duncan's chest while still mostly dressed - actually, she _knew_ she didn't mind. It's what best friends were for, right?

…

_Right?__!_

**A/N:**** TWO FLASHBACKS. Aren't you spoiled? NOW. Review!**


	6. Don't You Remember?

**Chapter Six; Don't You Remember?**

…

"_You can't go," Gwen gently huffed, her face a strong shade of pink. It fit nicely with the pastel-pink blankets that covered her, though he neglected to point it out – he wasn't a girl. On the windowsill was Duncan, halfway between jumping and staying to comfort the younger girl._

"_Mom keeps telling me not to stay out late."_

"_Yeah, but, you can just sleep over."_

_Duncan smirked a little, leaning back into the room._

"_And actually sleep, Duncan."_

_Duncan lost the glimmer of amusement. They had recently celebrated Gwen's thirteenth birthday. And, for some reason, that seemed to mean everything was about making out or getting girls – according to Duncan. Even if they were just friends, he'd always turn things into some silly double-meaning._

"_No fun."_

"_Fine, whatever, I don't even care! Go home," Gwen huffily dismissed. She cried a little harder when she heard Duncan shut the window behind him. The only reason she had started crying was because he had told her he was dating some girl named Lindsay. She was a dumb blonde girl who honestly didn't know what she was getting herself into._

"_Good. I don't need him anyway," she mumbled to herself as she wriggled further under her blankets._

…_._

That had been years ago, and only a few weeks before Duncan had given her the abrupt news he was moving away. It was also a moment they never really spoke about. Duncan had never ditched her when she was so upset, especially not when he had caused her to be so upset. It was one of those moments she attributed to her hesitance to accept him back when she first saw him. Although it wasn't actually entirely _his _fault, she still blamed him for the rift it caused them.

Gwen shuffled under her blankets, her cheek pressed tightly to something moving. A chest. Breathing. Wait - _what_? With one heaved sigh, Gwen pushed herself up from the dark blue bed. Her hands were poised either side of Duncan's chest, her hair falling into her eyes and obscuring her vision.

"We fell asleep?" Gwen asked with a groan

"Wasted a night in your bed? I suck," Duncan answered dumbly, pulling Gwen into a tight hug.

Gwen spluttered against the gesture, roughly shoving herself out of the bed and scrambling away. While Duncan seemed totally okay with being in her bed all night, here she was – totally _not _okay with it. What a jerk. "Uh! Hello! I have a boyfriend! This is so not okay!"

"We didn't do anything," Duncan moaned, throwing a pillow at her.

"We _do_ have school though!" Gwen yelled, noticing the clock. They had ten minutes till the bus arrived. Duncan was going to have to get on with her, at her stop. This – this was not going to go well at all. After booting Duncan into her brother's room and telling him to pick some clothes, Gwen pulled on a pair of jeans and a band t-shirt… And her boots obviously. She crammed her makeup into her bag and decided that, yes, she would put it on later.

It was only by chance that they wound up outside, dressed and ready for school so quickly. Gwen hadn't said much more to Duncan, outside "Hurry the hell up or I'll kill you!" She had good grades, and amazing attendance. That was not going to be affected by some jerk who decided to pass out in her bed, with her. She had meant for him to sleep over, maybe on the small couch in her room, or even downstairs… Not…

_JERK._

Gwen stomped down the bus and sat down next to Trent, her eyes betraying her anger (and her tiredness). He just carefully wound an arm around her shoulder and glared down the bus at Duncan. Duncan, on the other hand, seemed chipper. He received a few lame high-fives from his friends and a comment or two on his radically different attire. Gwen actually didn't notice because she was busy being utterly catatonic.

By the end of third period, she actually retold the story to Trent (who had only received a few grunts and nods for most of the day). They were once again sitting amongst Trent and his crew with their lunches… And despite the fact he had promised to sit with her friends, he kept making subtle suggestions that it wasn't a good idea.

"He slept over?" Trent asked across the table, his eyes gently narrowed for disgusted emphasis.

"Yes."

"And – in your bed?"

"Yeah."

"With you?"

"In your bed?"

Gwen shot him a dark look. "I'm dating you. It wasn't planned. We didn't _do _anything. I just thought I'd tell you before -"

"_Gwen's pretty hot when she wakes up. It's like, goth pinup of the month worthy,"_ Duncan happily admitted to his friends. He was sitting nearby (for whatever stupid reason) with a few of the stoner, loser kids. Gwen was sitting with Trent's friends (again) and trying not to kick Heather in the face (again). Gwen's face curled up into utter annoyance, her head slowly turning to glare in Duncan's direction. Even with their reconciliation the previous night, there was something about the self-assured smile and wink that just boiled her blood.

"It's fine," Trent tried to smile, but it was obvious. It _wasn't_ fine. "Hey, um, tonight?"

"Mhh?" Gwen gently agreed, prodding her cafeteria food with some amusement. It was actually half-decent today. That was a nice change from the usual slop. After a few bites, she realized that Trent wasn't continuing. Something about that struck her as weird (the fact he never stopped talking). So in some attempt to keep him going, she rolled her hand in his direction.

"… You forgot?"

"Uh… What was there to remember?"

"Oh," Trent sighed, shaking his head, "nothing."

Gwen sighed and slapped her fork down. Sometimes Trent could be such a girl. After he was _clearly _not going to continue, Gwen shimmied her chair around to face Trent. They shared a few moments of glared eye contact, neither really sure what there was to be angry about. "What?"

"Anniversary?"

Only after laughing and saying "_You're so funny, I thought you were serious!_" did Gwen realize that, no, it wasn't a joke at all. "Really?"

"Mhh. 5 months today," Trent chuckled hollowly, his eyes cast aside. He seemed to be contemplating a few things to say but it seemed to fail. Actually, it was a total failure. He just excused himself and walked off toward the music room (she _knew_ that's where he was going). In a split-second decision, Gwen gathered her bag up off the ground and followed after him, a frown etched into her face.

"Trent!" she called after him, only meriting a look over his shoulder.

"What?"

"Are – you seriously upset? I thought we agreed we weren't doing the stupid, coupley, month anniversaries… Just the one-year and whatever…"

"Who says we'll even make it a year?"

Gwen felt her eyes almost double in size. She actually felt the words that should have been said die in her throat. There was a point to that; who says they'd last longer than six months? Or even five and a half? Nothing in life _was_ certain. And with Trent, at this point of time… A year was sounding a lot longer than it should have.

"Gwen, I didn't… I didn't mean it like that. You know I didn't. I love you, a lot."

"Cool," Gwen breathily laughed, her arms crossed in front of her. Trent walked over and hugged her tightly, and their reconciled – she supposed. He had just said he loved her, and that he didn't mean it – she could understand. If he said he was rolling around in bed with Heather, she would have reacted the same way.

As the bell rung, Gwen groaned. Gym. With Coach Hatchett. Dodge-_freakin_g-ball.

_**A/N: Short chapter was short! Sorry.**_


	7. Sleepy Secrets

And _I'm sorry, so sorry_.  
I'm sorry it's like this.  
_I'm sorry, so sorry_.  
I'm sorry we do this.

**"They" by Jem.**

**Chapter Seven; Sleepy Secrets**

"I'd like to start by informing you that this year the school thinks it's best we eliminate the risk involved with Dodgeball."

The news, had it been delivered by anyone but Coach Hatchett, would have elicited a round of applause from the class. Instead, majority of the students remained stoically wary of what was to come next. Each student was dressed in the gaudy mixture of old and new sports uniforms, with scraggily looking shirts and worn-out shorts. If you were smart enough, you'd bring an outfit from home.

As Gwen plucked at her clothes sadly, she regretted not being smart enough to bring her own. She usually did, but that morning had allowed for a lot of time to prepare. She was also not even _awake_ enough to register the next several minutes of Coach Hatchett yelling at them for being pathetic or lazy or whatever new word he'd picked up since last year. She did notice the fact Duncan's earlier bravado had given way to tiredness and lethargic yawns. At least they were in the same boat.

When Trent took her hand, she gave him a sleepy sideways smile. His thumb took to tracing needy circles against the back of her hand, an example of his own unintentional need to keep Gwen's attention on him. It seemed he'd noticed her glaring down the group at Duncan. She smiled lazily back at Trent before noticing Cody being pummelled by orange balls.

"But I thought he said we weren't allowed to play Dodgeball..." Gwen mumbled to Trent.

"They just renamed it Balldodge."

"_Seriously?"_Gwen groaned, her eyes rolling to the ceiling. Of course he was serious.

The next two hours were spent in the most insufferable display of arrogance and athletic members of Gwen's class throwing balls around like there was no tomorrow. She managed to avoid most of the shots aimed at her, but Heather seemed more determined than ever to take her down. Gwen was almost thankful when she was sat out first with a bloody nose (thanks to the clearly smug Heather across the room).

…

"_I totally can not believe couples celebrate one-month or two-month anniversaries..." Trent laughed, his eyes settled on a tacky card designed with a pathetic looking teddy bear smothered in red and pink. It sported a title that read "Happy Three Months!" as if it were an achievement beyond measure._

"_I know, right?" Gwen cackled, her arms crossed as she examined the pens and pencils in the small gas station with a stern expression. She'd run out of pencils earlier and needed a quick solution. She grabbed a purple pacer, smiling over to her boyfriend proudly, "Can we never get that lame?" Her cool, cute boyfriend didn't seem the type to cling to dates or anniversaries, anyway. At worst he'd write her a song, and she wouldn't even mind that._

_She was a girl under all the sarcasm after all, so moments like six-months or a year were acceptable to celebrate._

"_Oh, trust me, I won't. I mean, if I start doing that, shoot me all right. Promise?"__Trent laughed, his hand finding Gwen's once again as they walked out towards Trent's very modest yet fancy car. It didn't have a fleck or dirt or dint anywhere on it. For someone in senior year, it was impressive._

_Gwen rolled her eyes, kissing him on the cheek. "Don't even have to ask. I'll miss you though, so it'll just be a paintball."_

…

The bus ride home was a little more awkward than Gwen liked to admit. Usually on a Friday night, she would be going to Trent's for their usual bad movies and fatty junk food. Due to the issues earlier, it wasn't the case – Trent pecked her on the cheek and offered some excuse about needing to do homework that evening before clambering off the bus without another word. Maybe it was his way of exacting revenge; maybe it was just how he decided to cope with whatever emotional issues he'd developed since this morning.

"Are you free tonight?" LeShawna asked from her perch just behind Gwen. The black girl seemed to assume that the answer was yes, moving to sit beside Gwen. "Bridgette, Izzy, Courtney and I were thinkin' of having a girls' night. Like we used to back in middle school."

Gwen frowned a little before nodding, "I – guess. Courtney? Really?"

"Girl, Courtney ain't that bad..." LeShawna trailed off before sighing, "okay, she's not my favorite stuck-up, two-timin', plannaholic, but she's a friend of Bridgette's... It's not that big a deal." They shared a moment of eye contact before LeShawna attempted a winning smile, "Please?"

"You know that doesn't work on me. I'm not Harold," Gwen scoffed, a small smirk crossing her features as LeShawna puffed up her cheeks in annoyance. "I'll go, but I've got to pick stuff up from my house first. Okay?" Gwen plucked her backpack up from the floor, managing to walk and co-ordinate her arms into the contraption. Part of her was annoyed she was basically coerced into attending a lame, girly sleepover when she could be sleeping or watching horror movies in her own time.

As Gwen strolled into her house, she was met with a frantic mother and an array of pizza menus and Chinese takeout fliers.

"Hi mom," Gwen greeted, her head tilted a little in confusion.

"Oh! Hello!" Linda smiled with her usual enthusiasm. "Just working out dinner."

"It's only like four in the afternoon mom, chill..." Gwen replied noncommittally before setting off toward the stairs. With any luck, she could pack a bag, scarf down dinner and be off to LeShawna's within the hour. All she needed to do was avoid her mother at all costs.

"Duncan stayed over last night, didn't he?" Linda said with an imperceptible smirk – the same one Gwen wore when she thought she was being exceptionally witty. The young goth slowed her steps before turning to her mother. They shared a moment of defiant eye contact and Gwen was acutely reminded she was her mother's daughter. Although there was more optimism and flamboyancy from her mother than she ever thought capable of a person, Gwen could see the snarky flicker in her eyes and the subtle defiance she wore on her own face.

"Not what you're thinking at all! Mom! Stop looking at me like that!"

…

"_Gwen, I made you and Duncan pancakes," Linda announced happily, trouncing into her daughter's bedroom with the food in hand. Her expression turned from bouncily amused to downright pleased with herself as Gwen scrambled to cover Duncan's sleeping form with a blanket. "Sweetie, I know he's here. I can see his foot."_

_"He just stayed over to watch movies!"_

_"Mhm, I'm not saying anything," Linda gently laughed before setting the pancakes down. She had two plates in hand, easily prepared for the commonly present Duncan. The older woman could see in her little girl's face the fear and utter anxiety at her mother knowing._

_They were eight. Linda wasn't worried._

"It's just like when you were younger. Sneaking him in, thinking I have no idea about your little sleepovers. Although, I have to say, I want you being safe..." Linda trailed off before plucking up a pizza menu.

"Mom! I'm staying over at LeShawna's tonight," Gwen snapped before tromping upstairs, her eyes narrowed. It was _her_ job to be smug and amused. At least she could be thankful for the total lack of Duncan in her day, aside from the very brief, huffy glares Gwen would send his way. But was she really all that angry at him for staying over? How much of it was her just acting the way she thought she was supposed to react to the situation.

A little, teeny, tiny, weensy bit of her thought the cocky smirks he kept sending her were a little cute. Just a little.

**A/N: Not very extensive, but I'll be trying to do more chapters soon! Hopefully with**_**less**_**of a break. REVIEWS KEEP ME GOING. Xoxoxo.**


	8. Even Sleepier Secrets

**Chapter Eight; Even Sleepier Secrets**

Gwen arrived at LeShawna's house an hour later, a slice of pizza sloppily pinched between her fingers. She shouted a thanks to her mother over her shoulder, shifting her bag a little higher onto her back before approaching the double-story house she was very familiar with.

LeShawna lived with her sister, two brothers and parents. It was a nice house, complete with an amazing backyard perfect for parties. Of course, LeShawna could never convince her parents the same. They always considered having a party there one day there.

"Girl, why are you eatin'! We're ordering pizza now," LeShawna whined, waving a hand behind her. Bridgette smiled, ear pressed against the phone as she waited for the dial tone to become a voice.

"Because I like my pizza breasy, covered in dead animals and barbeque sauce – Bridgette would kill me if I ordered the Noah's Ark with extra bacon around her," Gwen explained, taking a healthy bite of the piece she was gesturing to. Bridgette visibly paled, her eyes wider than before.

"Those poor little piggies…"

"Yeah, okay, we get it Miss Animal-Fan," LeShawna laughed, stepping aside to allow Gwen inside. They were set up in the upstairs study for the moment, which faced LeShawna's room. But given the giant bed, plush bean bags, vanity and walk-in closet, there wasn't really room to veg. Plus, eating in there and messing stuff up was basically a death sentence in LeShawna's mother's eyes.

"All right, so we've got a plain pizza, a vegetarian, and… Fine, a Hawaiian pizza," Bridgette sighed, admitting defeat. She clearly hated the idea of devouring an animal, but she hated the idea of LeShawna glaring at her even more. With the pizza ordered, the three girls sat around in the study. It was awkward, but familiar. They'd been close since the end of middle school when LeShawna, Gwen and Bridgette had shared a table in the art room.

"I thought you said Izzy and Courtney were gonna be here," Gwen yawned, pulling a can of cola towards herself – there were drinks, chips and candy all across the short coffee table. She smiled at Bridgette (who seemed to be jittery about _something)._

"Izzy called to say she was fighting a bear," LeShawna sounded totally unimpressed, completing the claim with bunny-ear fingers, "and Courtney is gonna be a bit late. But girl! Damn, okay, I have to ask, what the heck was with you and Trent earlier?" LeShawna quickly asked, not even bothered to work her way up to the question.

"Long freaking story," Gwen sighed, quickly regaling the two girls with the story of how Duncan had crashed at her house, and how annoyed Trent had been. "I mean, it'll be fine, he just needs time. Sometimes I feel like he's _too_ attached, y'know?"

"Like Harold? The boy is sweet, but he needs to cool his jets."

"Geoff just makes me really cute… _things_ out of clay. I don't even know what they are half the time, but they're always made with love," Bridgette sighed, his hands set under her chin with a smile wide across her face. Gwen had to agree 'things' was the best way to describe the seal and the iguana he'd made – well, that's what he claimed they were, they looked like blobs to Gwen.

When Courtney arrived downstairs, LeShawna rushed down to meet her. They'd spent the better part of an hour devouring pizza and discussing their boyfriends like any other group of happy teenage girls would. It was actually fun, which surprised Gwen. She never expected herself to enjoy this kind of sleepover, but there she was with her hair in pigtails thanks to a bored Bridgette.

"Girls," Courtney greeted with a smile across her face as she strode in, exhibiting every level of confidence possible.

"Hi Courtney," Gwen replied, half-smiling as Courtney measured whether or not she was being sarcastic.

"I've written a list," Courtney instantly announced, whipping out a piece of paper from her pocket. It managed to remain perfectly folded, neatly covered in numbered agenda. "I thought it was best to avoid any and all chaos tonight, and ensure we cover every topic of conversation with equal interest and the correct amount of det – hey!"

LeShawna had made short work of the list. It was ripped up, placed carelessly into the bin a few feet away.

"Item number one was the discussion of whether or not the amount of funding was being channelled into – ugh. Fine, enjoy your chaos."

"And hi to you too, Courtney," LeShawna smirked, her hands on her hips, "don't make me regret letting you come to this."

Courtney pouted, her eyes avoiding the others. It was true, while Courtney was pretty, determined and smart, she managed to possess few real friends. Gwen had never had a problem with her, but she couldn't really stand being around her for very long periods of time. "I – fine… Thank you for inviting me. I had such a busy schedule of homework for this evening, but I suppose this is probably a forgivable exception… I brought hummus and pita bread!" Courtney offered up, smiling hopefully.

Gwen felt a little sorry for her, accepting the dip that was being offered up, "Awesome!"

"I can eat that! Yay," Bridgette excitedly announced. She'd been limited to lemonade, given all the candy and chips had animals' parts in them. Gwen almost felt sorry for her, but definitely enjoyed massacring the small packet of gummi bears on her own. It was only a matter of time before she destroyed the chips too – it amazed her how much she ate without putting any weight on.

"We were talking about our boy toys," LeShawna explained, pointing out a seat to Courtney. The girl took the offer thankfully, her knees politely snapped together as she nibbled on some pita bread.

"Oh? Well, I don't have anything to offer to that discussion. Gossip is a waste of time."

"So the rumour you were mackin' on that Duncan kid is just out of nowhere then?" LeShawna asked, her hands tucked under her chin with a smirk.

"It is! I – stop looking at me like that," Courtney whined, a blush rising in her cheeks. Gwen couldn't tell if it was embarrassment or anger, but she didn't particularly care. What interested her more was whether or not it was true. She sat up a little more, her eyes narrowed at Courtney.

"You and Duncan? Seriously? That makes zero sense."

"Excuse you!" Courtney growled, fists clenched on her knees. She took a calming breath, lips still pouted out defiantly, "While I admit he escorted me to dinner a few nights ago, we didn't kiss. I – it was just – he helped me out. Someone was drawing moustaches on my election posters and he stopped them. It was a thank-you dinner…"

Gwen's expression twitched, unsure how she felt about that. It was really nice of Duncan to stand up for someone, but – Courtney? And then dinner? She frowned, her knees hugged up to her chest as she swilled the rest of her cola like happiness was at the bottom of the cheap fifty-cent can.

"Well that's cute," Bridgette smiled, her hands distracted by weaving a friendship bracelet. She hoped that Courtney would see that, but the other girl just huffed a little.

"I wouldn't date him, if that's what you're thinking."

"Well good." Gwen snorted in amusement, only for her eyes to widen when she realized what she'd said. "Because he's just so wrong for you and everything. You're prep, he's a punk, it'd be weird." She realized that didn't help her point at all, especially given how she was dating a popular guy, and she wasn't exactly the coolest girl in school.

"Because you and Trent are just so perfect…" Courtney snapped back, "I'll date whoever I please."

LeShawna cleared her throat and announced there was no more discussion about boys. She pulled out a movie, waving it around in the air proudly, "I have, in my dainty little hand, the most tacky, old-school, lame chick flick compilation in existence. It starts with _10 Things I Hate About You!" _LeShawna smiled, popping the movie in and tossing a bunch of blankets and pillows at the other girls.

"_I like Kat," Gwen pointed out, her knees hugged up to her chest and her head on Duncan's shoulder. She'd convinced him to watch the movie with her, after explaining it was about a bad boy who smoked. It'd been an obvious plot to convince him anything 'awesome' happened in the movie._

"_Why? You're basically her little sister – you're gonna end up dating some scrawny lame kid," Duncan laughed, shrugging his shoulder._

"_Am not! I'm more like Kat than her sister…" Gwen huffed, pushing herself away from Duncan. "And you're basically Patrick."_

"_So you're saying you're gonna throw up on my shoes after getting wasted?"_

"_No!"_

"_That you're gonna sleep with some popular jock loser and regret it later?"_

"_You suck," Gwen groaned, punching him in the shoulder. She was thankful he waited till after the movie to complain, but it didn't help he honestly did remind her of Patrick. Except he didn't smoke, obviously. She was thankful for that._

After hours of watching tacky teen rom-coms, Gwen announced she was sick of uplifting narratives and lame actors. The other girls agreed, setting up make-shifts beds. Each had braids or plaits in their hair by this point and Gwen just couldn't help smiling to herself. It was nice to have distracted herself for a few hours, even at the cost of crappy movies. She bid the others goodnight, her eyes drooping almost instantly. She was freaking_ tired._

And her dreams may have been populated by a pyromaniac smoker with a serial killer smile.

**A/N: Girly sleep-over! I never thought about how appropriate 10 Things I Hate About You is for Gwen/Duncan. That happened by accident, promise! Please review! More drama coming in the next chapter. **


	9. Dress To Depress

**Chapter Nine: Dress To Depress**

"Who wants pancakes!"

Gwen awoke, head groggy and back sore. While she always enjoyed the late evenings that sleepovers promised, it also meant morning people trying to wake her up. The chocolate-chip pancakes did ease the blow, even if she wouldn't admit it. With a heavy sigh, she pushed herself off the thin mattress, mouth tacky and dry. "I hate you."

Courtney frowned.

"I - not really." Gwen shook her head, a smile on her lips. Courtney still wasn't accustomed to her brand of humour. "Not a morning person."

You're telling us - we're all dressed, ready to go shopping, and you're still in your pyjamas." LeShawna grinned, her eyes rolling to the ceiling. "

"Riiight... Mall trip. Yipee." Without any grace, Gwen fell onto the couch in the den, snagging up her plate of pancakes. "Difference being," she paused, taking a bite. "I don't take forever to get dressed." She shrugged, her pancakes not lasting long at all. They were delicious - who knew little miss class president was such a good cook. Once that was out of the way, she darted into the hallway bathroom to change quickly and do her makeup.

Five minutes later she emerged, her usual teal and black color scheme in place. "Ready!" The other girls just laughed, or, everyone except Courtney laughed. She seemed to be mumbling about a schedule, and bus times. The four of them headed downstairs and out the front door. Gwen was perpetually surprirsed by her friends; Bridgette, Courtney, LeShawna. Such a strange bunch, so mismatched. She had her goth friends, and she had these guys. And, well the popular people too, but...

"You need to start sitting with us again."

"Why am I so popular all of a sudden?" Gwen snapped, the tone transparently sarcastic.

They opted to walk, with Bridgette emphasising how important the enviroment was. The walk was forgivingly short, only about fifteen minutes. Courtney and Gwen managed to strike up a conversation on the spread of the school budget, if only because they agreed the arts suffered to the sports teams.

"The band gets nothing! We have to run fundraisers every single year to get to competitions." Courtney crossed her arms, frowning in front of her.

"Same with the art supplies. It's always 'bring your own'. And when we do get things, people steal it." Gwen growled, kicking a rock off the sidewalk. Behind them was Bridgette and LeShawna discussing Geoff and Harold. The occasional word like 'date' and 'gifts' kept popping up, and Gwen couldn't tell why.

Finally, they arrived at the mall. A hulking grey monstrocity, with carparks packed wall to wall with cars. Gwen was suddenly thankful they hadn't driven, seeing as they'd never find a park. A few trolleys were ditched in the gardens, and McRonald's bags fluttered by their feet. Bridgette peeled away from the group to snatch up some litter, quickly ditching it into a nearby bin. None of them had the heart to stop her, understanding it would only earn them an earfull of enviormental abuse complaints.

Gwen would have helped if she had gloves. After she caught a few pieces, Courtney set a hand on her shoulder. "Didn't you want to look at the surfboards?"

"I - yeah - sorry guys." Bridgette blushed, seemingly ashamed by her tirade. She accepted a towlette from Courtney, who seemed to have inumerous things in her handbag. Gwen was flat out impressed as she also offered some detol.

"Are you Mary Poppins? It'd explain the uptightness..."

Courtney frowned though the others laughed, and they all headed into the mall. They all had their own specific stores to visit, so they broke away with the understanding they'd meet up for lunch and start shopping as a group. Gwen had to visit Dark Lament and the art supplies store, while the others had their own stores. She didn't really know what they were after, but it definitely saved them all peace of mind. With phones, and an agreed meet-up spot, it was only a matter of time before they were properly hanging out.

Dark Lament was a clothing store, dedicated to second-hand clothing and everything of the goth variety. It blared music such as Gothic Mind Explosion, Infinity Clause and Darken End. The usual mindless yet amazing grunge, the thumping bass, the voices that sung of pain and joy... Definitely her kind of store. In particular, she needed to start sourcing a dress she could use for all the dances this coming school year. With Trent around, she finally felt like she could attend them and actually have fun.

As she stepped inside, a contrast of neon lights and shadows spilled over her. The morning was so much more bearable. She glanced between racks, trying to spot where the fancier dresses were set up. It was then she saw an astroturf shark fin sailing across a rack, rounding the corner right towards her.

"Duncan." Gwen's voice was hollow, more surprised than pleased. She wasn't sure if it was the store that surprised her most, or the fact he was up so early on a weekend. Or maybe it was the casual way he sipped at his slushie, even though the store prohibited food and drink. She scoffed, arms crossed. "Aren't you a rebel."

Duncan shrugged, one hand tucked into his jeans pocket. He sipped once more, eyes narrowed at her. "Why're you here?"

"Uh, shopping. Why else would I be here?" Gwen tried not to smile, not sure if he even thought that question through. Wasn't this the exact sort of place she would be found? It wasn't till a few seconds later, she recalled what he'd been like the other day. After he'd stayed over, and caused so much trouble for her with Trent, and her mother. And the rumour about him dating Courtney? A sudden well of annoyance rose in her, her shoulders squared. "Why are you here?"

Duncan shrugged. "Meeting someone later. Needed to kill time. Also, needed new jeans." He looked around before making eye contact with Gwen once more. "Where's your boyfriend?"

Gwen almost snapped back with 'I don't know' but felt that wouldn't have the right impact. "Band practice. They have a gig tonight." The details were so vague to her, though she was glad she had them. She didn't want to seem ignorant of her boyfriend's whereabouts. Especially not with Duncan, who was already about to pounce on her for the smallest things. Not pounce in a literal sense - just make stupid comments. She puffed out a cheek, frowning at his jeans.

"Ooh, a gig. What do they play? Nickleback covers?"

"Take that back!"

"Or are they real edgy, playing ooh, I don't know, Simple Plan?"

Gwen almost growled, her hands tiny fists by her sides. She managed to push down her annoyance, brushing her hair over her ear. "He plays his own music." The tone was unfamiliar to her - pride, but not quite. It felt as though she lorded the information over Duncan, rather than actually feeling proud of her boyfriend. After a moment of glared eye contact, she poked him in the chest. "Can you stop being so mean about him? It's annoying."

"You act normal till we talk about that idiot."

"Then why do you bring him up?"

"'Cause he's your boyfriend."

"And?"

Duncan clenched his jaw, a cool expression replacing what would have been anger. He let out a breath through grit teeth, a smirk slowly forming. "Dunno. I like pissing people off."

"That'd explain why you'd want to date Courtney."

That hadn't been how Gwen wasn't to broach the topic. She hadn't even wanted to touch on it at all, her mind whirlling in hope she could turn back to. Or maybe even step back out of the store and pretend she hadn't seen Duncan at all today. Every time they met, it was an annoying mix of the past trying to start and the future stomping all over it.

Duncan stayed quiet, sipping his slushie. After a moment, he met her eye. "It's not like that."

"Bye Duncan." Gwen rolled her eyes, turning on her heel. She had dresses to look at, and her friends to meet up with. Even if Courtney was one of them. Her wrist was caught by Duncan, but she waved him off. He didn't hold on tight, or even try to keep her in place, but she stopped walking. She turned back to raise an eyebrow at him, head tilted. "I'm happy for you."

"Then why don't you act like it?" Duncan narrowed his eyes, lips turned down in a small frown.

"Same reason you don't act like you're happy for Trent and I." Her tone clipped with each word, her mind forming words before she could second-guess them. This felt so familiar, the same fight they'd had when they were younger. It annoyed her more than anything else, some indescribable knot forming in her stomach.

"Cause I'm not happy for you!"

"Neither am I!" Gwen snapped back.

They stared at one another, eyes searching the other's face. It lasted a few seconds, Duncan's hand still outreached towards her wrist. Gwen finally snatched her hand back against her chest, lips pouted out. These moments reminded her they weren't the same kids. There wasn't any innocence to be found, no soft laughs, no easily, clusmily delivered apologies. There wasn't a tree to hide in, not while the music thumped around them and the lights kept flashing. Gwen's attention skipped between Duncan's face and the table of tshirts beside her. Finally, she stepped away.

"Neither are you, what?"

"I'm not happy for you."

"That's not how that sounded." Duncan cocked a brow at her, the same protective, defensive stare that plagued him when they were younger. It always happened at birthdays, or when there was a dance at school. She forgot about those times when they fought; it was only the now, the childish way he played aloof and mysterious. She hated it.

"I'm meeting my friends." Gwen answered again, her hand default to behind her neck. She wouldn't meet his eye, her attention still focused just behind his hip on a bargin bin of chokers and chain bracelets. After he didn't reply, she met his eye. They stared for a moment, at least until Gwen turned away. "I'll see you around."

"Gwen, don't be like that." His voice was almost a plead.

"I really do, though." She growled. "Look, why don't you and Courtney come to Trent's gig tonight. We can hang out then. Trent and Courtney get alone well enough." Gwen smiled hopefully, as if this would bridge the gap. It might fix things between them, ease the differences in their groups. Their groups? Gwen bit her tongue. She wouldn't mind hanging out with Duncan, and her goth friends, and the girls. Whether Duncan would want to hang out with the popular kids was another matter entirely.

Duncan took a moment to reply, dropping his slushie and kicking it under the rack. It was empty, Gwen noted. She rolled her eyes, trying not to scold him. "I'll think about it. See what the missus says."

A chill ran down her back, her eyes narrowed. She brushed the brief annoyance aside, not sure where it had spawned from. "I'd love to see you around more, you know."

"I'll visit more."

Gwen ran a hand down her face, peering between her fingers at him. "I meant hanging out, in public, not you staying over more. Not after you made it so freakin' suspicious on the bus. High-fiving people? What the Hell did you say?" That had been something she needed to talk to him about, but hadn't had the chance. She watched as his expression shifted through a few different stages of avoiding an answer. "Ugh - whatever - I don't even want to know."

Duncan chuckled, running a hand along his chin. The stubble caught at his fingertips, her eyes unconciously watching their path. "I'll tell you when you're older."

"Two months younger than you - shut up!" Gwen laughed, trying to stay mad at him. He made it impossible, with every smile and joke. Though she wouldn't admit it, his return had been the best thing to happen to her in a long while. Excluding Trent, she reminded herself. It was then she remembered she needed to get in contact with him about tonight, to organize when he'd pick her up. Before she knew it, she was enveloped in a hug.

"See you later, Spooky."

Gwen hugged him back, a soft laugh bubbling through her smile. "Stop with the nickname, Astroturf." With that, he headed off and out of sight. She turned her attention back to the dresses on display. She decided it wasn't the time to start picking dresses out for school dances - it was boring. Onto art supplies, she grinned.

...

A/N: Hope you liked this! Review please!


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